I have to say that when I walked out of the school that day, I felt relieved. I was relieved as my daughter was finally safe. I no longer sat in my car at school wondering whether today was the day she decided that she could do things her way. I could go to bed knowing she wasn't out somewhere doing something that could potentially hurt or kill her. My life didn't get any easier, in fact it got more difficult. I now had a new set of worries and struggles in my life.
The first thing my daughter was to do at her new school was to write a guilt letter. This letter had to tell us everything she did that we did not know about. The letter came about a week and a half into the program. The letter was nine pages long. I had been reading her IM and emails on a daily basis. She didn't have texting and a lot of the time she didn't have her phone as she was grounded. There couldn't be much that I didn't know about. I was quite surprised; there was a lot I didn't know. I felt I was a diligent parent and kept tabs of what was going on. I knew there were things that I found out about after they happened, but I really felt I knew the worst of everything. I am here to tell you that no matter how much you know, double it and that is how much you do not know. Even if your child does not have texting, a cell phone or a computer, all his/her friends do and are very willing to let your child use it.
After reading through the letter, I wrote back and asked some questions. Another week passed before I received my response along with more guilt. Although this process was tough for both her and I, it was good to finally know what was really going on in my daughter's life. It made me realize that I made the right decision. I accepted the guilt letters and now we could begin the process of healing and moving forward.
A couple weeks later I received my first call from her. It was so good to hear her voice. There was a lot of crying from both of my daughters, but it was a really good call. She apologized to us and told us how much she loved us. It was the best feeling in the world. I honestly never thought I would hear her say 'I love you Mom' and really mean it. The work had begun and it seemed that it was all working well. The next week we received another call and that also went fairly well. She seemed to be adjusting and she liked the other girls in the program. I thought this is just what she needed and she will excel very quickly. It only lasted a couple of weeks. She started to act out and disobey the rules of the school. As a result we didn't get a call the next week. Her counselor called within a couple days to let us know that the phone call home was a privilege and had to be earned. She said my daughter was being disrespectful to others in the program as well as the counselors. She said that this type of behavior is expected and just to wait it out as things will turn around. I felt this was the beginning of a long roller coaster ride.
No comments:
Post a Comment