What a spectacular day! My younger daughter and I reached the campus about 8:45 am. We went into the office to sign in and get our name badges. We waited there a few minutes, with other families, to be escorted to the house. The 'house' is a term used by the school. It is a general meeting building. The students spend a good part of their day in and around the house. As we entered the house we could hear the students clapping and cheering us on. It added to all the excitement we all felt to see our children. My daughter just about ran me down. We held onto each other for quite sometime. Then my two daughters hugged and cried together. We hugged and said hello to my daughter's big sisters as well. It was a wonderful welcome.
We sat and talked with the girls' and their families for quite sometime. The girls' told us stories of what was happening with them and we told them what was happening with us. We had a lot of laughs. It came time for presents. We brought presents from the whole family and she was thrilled with everything. After gifts were opened there was one more gift up on stage. It was covered by a sheet. This gift is for all of the students and it is from their science teacher. He was sick and could not attend the festivities. One of the students and the athletic coach stood up and read his letter. The story was told of a man that goes way beyond the expectations of a science teacher. We were told how he would be at the house during the day and would spend time talking and helping out all of the kids. By the time the letter was done being read there wasn't a dry eye among the staff or students. I have to say that I feel all the staff plays the same type of role with all the students. I couldn't have picked a better place for my daughter to get help.
The gift was unveiled and it was a 54" Flat Screen TV and a beautiful wooden base that he had someone make for the TV. It was an incredible present. We were told how he continually invested in the school to help make things better for the students and staff. Two of the students had put together a slide show of this teacher and showed it on the new TV. It was an awesome presentation. When all was said and done my daughter's and I decided to play Rummikub a gift my daughter received from Santa. One of my daughter's classmates was watching as we started to play. We asked him to join in the fun. I didn't realize how difficult it was to try and explain all the different ways to place your tiles. My youngest daughter won and I lost. I had the most points at the end of the game. After the game was over we had appetizers. The food was very good and never ending. The whole day was just great.
My daughter and I did spend some time talking about some of her issues. I realized over the last few months that there are a lot more things to deal with than just drugs and alcohol. They are only part of what is going on in her life. She has a lot of things to overcome before she can feel she can be happy without drugs or alcohol. Right now she can't believe by just talking about her issues that she is going to be able to live without alcohol when she graduates. I feel for her insecurities and wish I had the magic words that made everything click. She is still in the beginning stages of her rehabilitation though. I firmly believe the program and the people I have entrusted with my daughter's future is the best decision I ever made. I just feel extremely thankful that she wants to discuss these issues with me. A year ago she would walk away every time I tried to say anything. She now brings things up and looks to me for my care and concern for how she is feeling and what she is going through.
It now came time to say our goodbyes. This is the part none of us like, but my daughter is planning on bringing up for another off-campus visit in the next couple of weeks. Knowing that we are going to see her within the next month makes saying goodbye a little easier. We also know in the next few months, she will be starting track, so we will see her more often. We have things to look forward to now and that makes everything a lot easier. After taking a few more pictures and saying goodbye to my daughter's big sisters, it was time to give one last hug and kiss. It was difficult on all of us, but it was also wonderful to have that time with her. I couldn't ask for a better day.
Monday, December 27, 2010
Wednesday, December 22, 2010
# 9 Road to Recovery
I am a person that lets things roll off my back. I do not stay sad or angry for any real length of time. This was the one time that I just could not get past how horrible I felt. I felt extremely horrible for three days and then it subsided to just horrible for another week. My younger daughter cried every day for two weeks. I felt so bad for her. It was the first time she had seen her sister in five months and it ended on such a bad note. I felt like I had betrayed both of my children and I just didn't have the words or actions to make it all better.
When I left my older daughter with her counselor, things did not go well. She gave her counselor a tough time and ended up getting demoted for her actions. It took her almost a full month to crawl back out of her hole. Her counselors asked me to come in and meet with her after about three weeks. They wanted me to face her and let her know that she needed to stay and graduate from the program. I was to tell her that she would not be coming home any earlier. I met with her and although it was tough at first, everything went well and she accepted the fact that she was going to stay until she graduated the program. I gave her a big hug and told her I loved her and how proud I was of her. She told me she loved me and apologized for being so angry with me. We said our goodbyes once again.
She worked to get her job back as well as getting back on the Cross Country team. She was once again happy and headed in a forward direction. She ran in a few meets and did well. She kept saying she could do better and I tried to remind her that this was the first time she had ever run Cross Country. She was doing great and to keep her head up. It was now the end of the Cross Country season and there were only two more meets to go. My younger daughter and I were asked to go to both meets. The first one was on a Saturday. It was a cold day, but it did not matter, we were there to cheer her on and enjoy the time we had with her. She ran the race and came in 6th out of 12 girls for a 3 mile run. She did great and I was so happy for her. We then went to have lunch with the team. We spent the next hour or so laughing, eating and telling stories. It was a great day.
The last meet was the championships and there were six teams competing. My younger daughter and I met up with the team about 11:00 am. The races were not starting until 2:00, but her school was sponsoring the championships and had to be there early to set up the course. It was a comfortable fall day and everyone was excited for this race. A few of the other parents came to the meet as well, so I spent some time talking with them. It was nice to meet the other parents. We had a lot to talk about and they all felt the same as I did about the school and how much better their children were doing now. It also gave my daughters time to spend alone and talk. It came time for the races to begin. It was so exciting to be part of such an important time for my daughter. She was nervous, excited and anxious all at the same time. The students of our school were phenomenal. All three of our school's teams placed high in the ranking. The varsity team came home with the championship. It was an exhilarating event and my daughter placed 10th. All three girls placed in the top ten and won medals. I was so proud of all of them. They all pulled together and showed everyone what a team could do. After everything was picked up we headed out to go have dinner. It was a lot of fun to listen to the kids talk about the race and how they felt. Once again we had good food, good conversation and a fantastic day.
It is now getting close to the holidays and my daughter asked us to come to the Christmas celebration on Christmas Eve. Of course I said yes. It is going to be a fantastic day. In the meantime, she is doing extremely well in school and is on the honor roll. She has never been on the honor roll and had never had the inclination to even try to do this well with her schoolwork. She is also working towards the next level which is Department Head. She works very hard over the next couple of weeks. By the beginning of December she makes it to Department Head. She will be running the Communications Dept that she once worked in. She feels so good about herself and her accomplishments. I can hear it in her voice when we talk on the phone. I tell her I love her and how proud I am of her. We talk about the upcoming Christmas celebration and how excited we are to see each other. She asks me to tell her younger sister how excited she is to see her and that she loves her very much. I tell her I will and we say our goodbyes. I now remember what it felt like waiting for Santa to come. I look at her picture everyday and tell her how many more days until we see her.
I know it is going to be a little difficult, but if I didn't do what I did with her, we may not be having Christmas together this year. As hard as it was on our first off-campus visit together, I would much rather go through that again than not to have her in my life at all. We are going to weather a lot of storms, but now we are going to weather them together. We now have a future and I am so thankful and grateful.
When I left my older daughter with her counselor, things did not go well. She gave her counselor a tough time and ended up getting demoted for her actions. It took her almost a full month to crawl back out of her hole. Her counselors asked me to come in and meet with her after about three weeks. They wanted me to face her and let her know that she needed to stay and graduate from the program. I was to tell her that she would not be coming home any earlier. I met with her and although it was tough at first, everything went well and she accepted the fact that she was going to stay until she graduated the program. I gave her a big hug and told her I loved her and how proud I was of her. She told me she loved me and apologized for being so angry with me. We said our goodbyes once again.
She worked to get her job back as well as getting back on the Cross Country team. She was once again happy and headed in a forward direction. She ran in a few meets and did well. She kept saying she could do better and I tried to remind her that this was the first time she had ever run Cross Country. She was doing great and to keep her head up. It was now the end of the Cross Country season and there were only two more meets to go. My younger daughter and I were asked to go to both meets. The first one was on a Saturday. It was a cold day, but it did not matter, we were there to cheer her on and enjoy the time we had with her. She ran the race and came in 6th out of 12 girls for a 3 mile run. She did great and I was so happy for her. We then went to have lunch with the team. We spent the next hour or so laughing, eating and telling stories. It was a great day.
The last meet was the championships and there were six teams competing. My younger daughter and I met up with the team about 11:00 am. The races were not starting until 2:00, but her school was sponsoring the championships and had to be there early to set up the course. It was a comfortable fall day and everyone was excited for this race. A few of the other parents came to the meet as well, so I spent some time talking with them. It was nice to meet the other parents. We had a lot to talk about and they all felt the same as I did about the school and how much better their children were doing now. It also gave my daughters time to spend alone and talk. It came time for the races to begin. It was so exciting to be part of such an important time for my daughter. She was nervous, excited and anxious all at the same time. The students of our school were phenomenal. All three of our school's teams placed high in the ranking. The varsity team came home with the championship. It was an exhilarating event and my daughter placed 10th. All three girls placed in the top ten and won medals. I was so proud of all of them. They all pulled together and showed everyone what a team could do. After everything was picked up we headed out to go have dinner. It was a lot of fun to listen to the kids talk about the race and how they felt. Once again we had good food, good conversation and a fantastic day.
It is now getting close to the holidays and my daughter asked us to come to the Christmas celebration on Christmas Eve. Of course I said yes. It is going to be a fantastic day. In the meantime, she is doing extremely well in school and is on the honor roll. She has never been on the honor roll and had never had the inclination to even try to do this well with her schoolwork. She is also working towards the next level which is Department Head. She works very hard over the next couple of weeks. By the beginning of December she makes it to Department Head. She will be running the Communications Dept that she once worked in. She feels so good about herself and her accomplishments. I can hear it in her voice when we talk on the phone. I tell her I love her and how proud I am of her. We talk about the upcoming Christmas celebration and how excited we are to see each other. She asks me to tell her younger sister how excited she is to see her and that she loves her very much. I tell her I will and we say our goodbyes. I now remember what it felt like waiting for Santa to come. I look at her picture everyday and tell her how many more days until we see her.
I know it is going to be a little difficult, but if I didn't do what I did with her, we may not be having Christmas together this year. As hard as it was on our first off-campus visit together, I would much rather go through that again than not to have her in my life at all. We are going to weather a lot of storms, but now we are going to weather them together. We now have a future and I am so thankful and grateful.
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